Remorse
by G-Hero
Summary: Tahiri remembers her fallen love, Anikan Solo. Very Short. May become an ongoing series, sort of The Adventures of Tahiri type of thing.


Star Wars: Remorse  
  
Geoff Adkins  
  
The room was cold and there was nothing she could do about it. No matter what the temperature was her body was numb. She did not care either. The war was over except for one last battle. The most important one was not yet fought. She hated him.  
Tahiri sat on the edge of her bed. It had always seemed to big to her but know just climbing into it every night was a challenge. She had dreamed that after they were older Anikan Solo would help her make the bed smaller. But know that will not happen. Her heart was matched the temperature in the room. It was the only way to block the hurt of Anikan's death. She loved him.  
Why did he have to die, she thought in her head. The thought was the only one she had since the last conflict. He had died several months before the end of the war with the Yuuzhan Vong, but she kept fighting and to her surprise living. Even though she tried her best to stop living. She hated him.  
Why did he have to be a hero, she thought as she laid her head on her soft pillow. Anikan had always wanted to live up to the heroic stories of his family and not repeat the evils of the same family. It was a fine line most Jedi walked, between the light and the dark. But he had always managed to keep both feet planted firmly in the light. Right up to his last charge. She remembers the glow around his young body as he slashed his way through the wave of Yuuzhan Vong warriors. His body had seemed to just dissolve into the large assemble of warriors. She loved him.  
Why did he have to be so selfish, was her next thought as she tossed in the big bed. He was always trying to be the hero.. not that so bad. He ways allows putting his safety behind that of others. Always volunteering for missions that others would never accept. She knew in her heart that that was a good noble thing, but she it did not mean she had to like it. She also knew it was wrong but it was one more reason she hated him..  
Why did he have to die, she thought again. It all comes back to that. As she laid in the bed her room immersed in darkness, she began to weep. The tears flowed down her face she felt the Force flow around her and through her. It in gulfed her in a warm embrace, as if it were Anikan wrapping his strong arms around her one last time. She longed to reach out and hold him or just one more time to press her lips to his. It seemed she never got the chance to deepen their relationship but she knew he was her one true love. She would do anything to have him back. As she laid there with her eyes closed and visions of her lost love the warmth that had surrounded her past and she was again alone in the cold, dark room. She loved him.  
She sat up in the bed her legs too short for her feet to fully touch the floor. A thought crossed her mind that brought a small smile to her face. Just as quick as it arrived it passed, a little moment of joy in her time of sorrow. Her day was just beginning though. She had to pull herself together. Anikan's family was on their way to pick her up. It was nice to be around them but it also hurt. It seemed to serve as a reminder to the life she could have had, with the man she could have loved. She waited for them to come to her room. Of course she knew they were in the building, but she wanted just a little more time to herself. She had to be strong. She had to make through the memorial for those who lost the lives during the war. There were so many but only one she truly loved.  
She knew what she had to do knew, that it was her only way to find peace. True peace through the Force. She went toward the door even before she heard the first knock. She would make it one more day as a adopted member of the Solo family, but this would be the last day. Tomorrow would be the first day of the rest of her life. Her bags were already packed and tucked discreetly under her bed. She was only taking the essentials with her. As she took her first steps into a much larger world, a place where she was on her own with nothing but the thoughts of her lost love to keep company. 


End file.
